Thursday, 21 May 2015

What a mess!

        It is time for people to see beyond the mess and embrace the children behind it!!

I have become increasingly frustrated recently with tales of people who enjoy telling us parents that our houses are "Messy", "Dirty" and "Untidy". As parents, we are always trying to juggle work, housework and bringing up our children. Don't get me wrong, I love it when I have a clean and tidy home, but too often I find myself worrying what other people might think if i haven't managed to do the washing up or put the clean clothes away.

I cannot imagine how working parents manage it, I struggle enough as a stay at home Mum to keep things sparkling and beautiful in my home. With a baby, I am forever trying to fit in cleaning the house around feeds, mounds of washing and of course, most importantly, spending time with my daughter. Even with one child at school, I find myself realizing the school run has come round again and I still haven't hoovered or dusted!

But, then I look at my children. They are happy, healthy and what if their shoes have been kicked out of place or there are piles of their artwork in the corner! It is just a shame that there are people out there who do not see things this way.

I know a few Mums who have pressure from family and friends around them to keep their houses "tidier". For me, it is hard to stomach that people can add to the already busy pressures of a parents life with such comments. I am lucky, I do not get this from my family. I do always find myself apologizing for the mess and yes, I admit I do have a usual mad dash to tidy as much as I can before people come over, but I feel that most people know I am doing my best!

My main cleaning times are when my baby is asleep or at night once they are both tucked up in bed, But, like most parents, I often find myself so tired at the end of the day, I end up saying "I will do that tomorrow!" I am human after all, not a robot!! I also feel my children deserve my time where I can and so the cleaning can wait if it means my daughters feel they have had quality time with me. My eldest said to me today "I want to do something special with you now I am home" The baby was asleep and I was trying to quickly tidy up after dinner. I tidied a little (I feel that it is important I don't always just drop everything....they need to learn to wait!) but, I left the rest to spend time with her as she had asked. After all, she had been at school all day and just wanted a little Mummy time without sharing it with her sister!

So, I think the message I am trying to get across is to not pressure will get done eventually and your children will not remember how clean the house is, but the quality time they got to spend with you. And to outsiders looking not be so quick to judge.....look how happy the children are and look at the fun they are having and how they are blossoming!

Forget the dust , you can do that some other time,
So what if the kitchen shows a little grime,
It will get sorted when your babies are sleeping,
What they need is your time when they are tired and weeping,
They need you to show them you can spare a minute or two,
To walk to the park or go to the zoo,
To draw a picture or read them a book,
Forget the pile of washing, just don't look!
You know it will get done, just when you are ready
You just have to take things a little more steady!
And if it is too much, ask them to help too,
There is so many tasks a child can do!
They can help you dust or mop the floor,
Sometimes it can help them to learn even more!
So take a deep breath, and enjoy your little treasures
For they are one of lifes many pleasures.

C. Maskell

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