Monday, 18 March 2013

How very dare you Mummy!!

                        My daughter gets her own back for Mummy's one night out!

I am writing a bit of a personal post today, as I am sure there are Mums out there who may have had similar issues!! I had a great weekend, with going out with friends and staying over their house as a lovely treat. My husband and daughter dutifully dropped me off, waving me goodbye from the window and blowing me kisses. It was a good night out!

So, Sunday I get home and everything is great. The house was a mess, granted, but by all accounts my daughter had been very well behaved for her Daddy. She had cried a little on the way home from leaving me, as usually if I go out, she is at home and waves me off. Leaving me somewhere else was obviously a little different to her! She had a little sleep open arriving home yesterday and then was full of beans all the way up till bedtime!

So, she goes to bed like a dream, as she does most nights, and a very tired me heads of to bed, with my husband not far after. This is when the story changes. 12.35 a.m she begins to cry. My husband goes to see to her..."No Daddy!, Go away! I want my mummy!" She was inconsolable. I went in to calm her down. We cuddled. She said Goodnight. 10 Minutes pass "Mummy, my tummy hurts". I go to see to her as she had tried something new for her dinner that evening and I was concerned it may have upset her stomach. She was fine. Put her back into bed.

1.15 a.m on the clock. She cries out again, this time her "bottom hurts" Daddy and Mummy ignore. The tears get louder and louder "I want my books, its morning time" Grrr!! After calmly explaining that it was not time for stories and then sternly saying Mummy was getting cross, I thought we were getting somewhere. 1.45 am........ "Mummy where are you?" Ignored by Mummy. To which she gets out of bed and turns on her light to play. No such nonsense for a now very tired and irritable mummy.

To cut a long story short, after a long explanation that Mummy was only in her bedroom and not far away, and that she wasn't going anywhere that at 2.45 a.m Mummy finally feels able to go back to sleep! What a night!

I am sure that the majority of this incident is down to a little Separation anxiety. She is used to me going out of an evening, but I am always there when she wakes in the morning. Although she was fine with her Daddy the Sunday morning before they came to get me, I am sure that the fact she had left me somewhere new with people she didn't really know scared her a little.

It is hard in the situation when you are tired and it seems ongoing at night, not to loose your temper. Yet, it was the gentle reassurance that Mummy was staying put that eventually got her to settle. I did hear her cry out at around 6.30 a.m (her usual waking time) but left her to her own devices, where she fell back to sleep, not stirring for another hour.

When you stop and try to think about what it must have felt like to her to leave Mummy somewhere strange with practical strangers, it does put in perspective how she may have felt in the night. Perhaps it led to a night terror, which made her even more concerned and by keeping calling out and crying, she made sure Mummy was still around.

We have learnt with her now which are the "fake" attention cries at night and where she is actually upset. Last night was a mixture of the two, and so we were able to detect when she really needed comforting and when she did not. I am just hoping that tonight will bring a better one for all involved and that this does not start another spiral into troubled nights. It wont stop me having the odd well deserved overnight stay at someones house, either........she needs to learn and I need a break!!

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